Early Signs, Vol. 2 - Plot
Sitting here watching my beloved SEC lay an egg on New Year's Day. Largely tuning out commercials, when an apparent news report catches my eye.
Reporter: "And this just in, a small commercial plane has just crash landed in an upscale subdivision."
Max Boom, from his upscale(ish) neighborhood, perks up.
Reporter: "Here we have pictures of several victims being wheeled into the ER."
Max Boom, noticing the perfect lighting and the all-white constiuency of the ER, notes to himself "Good one, ER, or Trauma, or whatever one of you cheeseball hospital dramas you are, you got me for all of 5 seconds. Buy your ad man a snowball or something." Returns to picking fingernails.
Deepvoiced network announcer: "So tune in to next week's Desperate Housewives to find out who is injured, who shows up to console the victims..." blah, blah, blah.
Look, it's a free country. People can and do tune into shows that I can't for the life of me figure out how an amoeba would find interesting. That's all fine.
The question is this-- If you are one of the gay men or bon bon eating true "desparate housewives" looking to indulge in a little fantasy "projection" TV experiences, what do the scriptwriters and the programmers think of you?
ABC Boardroomm CEO: "Wait, let me get this straight. You have a show about a bunch of adulterous women living in a small neighborhood. One of likely millions of similar neighborhoods across the country. And you're suggesting that anyone with even an elementary education will accept that a small commuter plane, the kind which maybe crashes into an occupied area once every couple of years, will actually crash into one of your 6 main characters' houses?"
Desparate Housewives Scriptwriter: "Yes sir, I do. With all do respect, you don't know our target audience like we do."
You, yeah, you acting in the next 5 minutes in order to get that 2nd sham-wow absolutely free-- they're lookin' at you.
Reporter: "And this just in, a small commercial plane has just crash landed in an upscale subdivision."
Max Boom, from his upscale(ish) neighborhood, perks up.
Reporter: "Here we have pictures of several victims being wheeled into the ER."
Max Boom, noticing the perfect lighting and the all-white constiuency of the ER, notes to himself "Good one, ER, or Trauma, or whatever one of you cheeseball hospital dramas you are, you got me for all of 5 seconds. Buy your ad man a snowball or something." Returns to picking fingernails.
Deepvoiced network announcer: "So tune in to next week's Desperate Housewives to find out who is injured, who shows up to console the victims..." blah, blah, blah.
Look, it's a free country. People can and do tune into shows that I can't for the life of me figure out how an amoeba would find interesting. That's all fine.
The question is this-- If you are one of the gay men or bon bon eating true "desparate housewives" looking to indulge in a little fantasy "projection" TV experiences, what do the scriptwriters and the programmers think of you?
ABC Boardroomm CEO: "Wait, let me get this straight. You have a show about a bunch of adulterous women living in a small neighborhood. One of likely millions of similar neighborhoods across the country. And you're suggesting that anyone with even an elementary education will accept that a small commuter plane, the kind which maybe crashes into an occupied area once every couple of years, will actually crash into one of your 6 main characters' houses?"
Desparate Housewives Scriptwriter: "Yes sir, I do. With all do respect, you don't know our target audience like we do."
You, yeah, you acting in the next 5 minutes in order to get that 2nd sham-wow absolutely free-- they're lookin' at you.
Labels: Early Signs, Max Boom
posted by Max Boom | 3:27 PM
2 Comments:
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